Why did the 3 legged dog fall over? Because it was knocked over by a passing pedestrian.

A guy walks up to his boy and tells him, "Hey, if you don't stop masturbating you'll go blind." The boy says, "Who are you? Your not my father."

why was the apple on the ground? because it fell

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the most direct path to his destination.

ask me if im a door yes

What is worse than a papercut? Losing your legs in Vietnam.

A family goes to a talent agency and performs an act. They call themselves the aristocrats

What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

knock knock..... ding dong...... knock knock!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! they weren't home

hi im bob i ate a Pickle sucked a boob and died of a haert atak

Do't you just hate when a sentence doesn't end how you think it will and it just octopus.

Whats funnier than a dead baby?... a dead baby dressed as a clown whats funnier than that?... A pile of dead babies dreesed as clowns Whats funnier than that?... that the baby in the bottom of the pile is alive.

What do Batman and Harry Potter have in common? Their parents are dead.

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas ? cancer

why did the mexican beat your ass larry clark III because you live in a apartment with your mom and dad who are black your dad has a truck your mom recked her car

Whats more annoying than listening to another arrow in the knee joke? bink2w32.dll is missing from your computer.

Why didn't little Timmy get anything for Christmas? He was an orphan living on the streets.

A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

What did the cow do when it got run over by a tractor? It died.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear? The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

The woman says : OMG I am so hung over!! The man next to her has Terrible tourertts turns around and shouts I want my to make them hung over your face, her then moves away and rapes a apple of which he is eating, the woman turns around and dies as she has a brain tumor

Knock Knock Whos there? The Police, your mother just died of bowel cancer.

Why does mcguigan get made fun of ? Because he is gay with Jack Walsh

what is big and white? Your Mom

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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