A boy asked his dad Why are Chinese eyes like that. His dad replied there concentrating that's why there so smart The boy went up to a student in his class and said look I'm like you The teacher asked who told him that he said his dad The dad was called up by the school when the teacher told him what his son did he went GOOZILLA His wife asked him what he was up to and he said farting on her face when she was a sleep 3 days later he found out his wife was cheating on him he knocked on the door only to realize he was on drugs and that he never had a family.

Roses are red, Potatoes are yellow, ERMAHHHGERDDD PERRDERRRDERRR

A Russian drinking something other than vodka.

What do you call when you see a man murder 8 black guys? The police.

What did the trucker say when his hat blew out the window? "**** my hat!" What did the teenager say when the same thing happened to him in his small car? The same thing, except he was a teenager, driving a small car.

Q:Whats worse than you touching yourself at night A: The holocaust

A penguin walks into a bar and orders a beer................ PENGUINS DON'T WALK OR TALK

If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Worth more points.

A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

What did the Mexican man say to the black man? Hello, how are you today?

How do you choke a lawyer? You squeeze his neck until he stops breathing.

Why is it when birds fly in a "V" shape one side is longer? There's more birds on that side.

What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? I have to take off my boots to jump on the trampoline.

What did the Muslim do when he got on the bus? He realized he was in the wrong place and got on a plane and blew it up.

Hey I Just Met You , & This Is Crazy , But Here's My Status , So Like It Maybe ?

What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

An American, Mexican, and Chinese men are each asked to throw something off a cliff that they have too much of. The Chinese threw off rice. The Mexican threw off tacos. And the Americans.. Well.. They threw off the Mexicans.

You know what rhymes with school? Hell.

What does it mean when you have big shoes? Either you were genetically born with big feet, or you are wearing sheos that are too big for you.

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither, many scientists believe that the first living organisms on Earth were single-celled, prokaryotic bacteria.

Boy 1: Hey do you want my last chewing gum? Boy 2: Yeah please! Boy 1: Same. The boy continues to eat the chewing gum and finishes his shit wandering why the boy walked into the same cubicle as him.

Why was the blonde fired from the M &M's factory? Her Masters degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the job she had.

Why did the hot blonde strip down? So she can take a shower

I wonder where the hell Hitler is

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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