What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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did you hear the one about the boyscout and his scoutmaster? They had a lovely relationship, and both went on to be role models.

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What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

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What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

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FIRE!!

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Q: What is a African man with funny clothing and children straddling onto his back for dear life/ screaming in fear who only a few minutes ago before a particular incident made several young children cry and being chased by an authority figure? A: An intentionally inane circus performer partcipating in a scintillating rendition alongside his two children of who inadvertently frightened a small group of youth before he immediately decided to proceed by, during one of his extremely long, albeit few breaks, taking the members of his family on an interesting excursion to the nearby amusement park for occassional thrills. On the initial journey there, the black man, out of haste, accidentally dropped one of his children's most valuable toys of which elicited undeniably obnoxious bouts of sadness to come bursting out of his children's respective chests and an increased rate-of-travel for his wife of who accopanied him on his adventure and desired to assist him in his panic. In the spin of events, the man experienced an instance of hyper-activedness and spun out of control for a minute before eventually cooling down. Hence the screaming.

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What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A car that is driving recklessly and happens to have a Christmas paint scheme.

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what is worse then stubbing your toe in the dark? -september 11th

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A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

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Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

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Q: Why did the man move out of his house? A: He found another, for a better price.

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Where do bananas come from? Mexico

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Why did the women hit the telephone pole? There are many theories but one suggests that it is due to womens statistically lower cognitive spacial reasoning abilities.

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Oh look, I've found my knife

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A quadrapeldgic walks no where

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Q. Why do Puerto Ricans throw their trash away in clear plastic bags? A. So Italians can go window shopping.

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what did one caterpillar say to another caterpillar? let's be butterflies

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someone called a frog a frog

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What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

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What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

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What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

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why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

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Knock knock Who's there? Timmy Timmy who? Timmy Smith

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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