Roses are red violets are ponies I dont know what to say mircowave

What's red and smells like blue paint? red paint

What has 4 black legs, a green back, and will kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

what d you call three arabs walking through the desert? dehydrated.

Roses are red Violets are blue Your dog pooped on my lawn Now my violets are even more blue

Why does beonce say to the left, to the left. she doesnt she sings it.

Why didn't grandma ever return Johnathon's calls? Grandma was brutally murdered 2 years prior. Johnathon had issues believing that she was gone. He went on to live a life of pain and suffering, which would eventually lead to suicide at the age of 24.

where was the heart of ocean found. madelain mcanns urn

It's not just a boulder. It's a rock! A rooooocckk!

I think poop is tasty... just kidding.

Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

Two muffins are put in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "is it just me or is it getting hot in here?". The other muffin says,"HOLY CRAP!!!!! A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!".

Roses are Black Violets are black I am colorblind, are you to?

Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

Siri, what is your definition of love? "Let me check on that...Here's what I've found." Google.com search = definition of love

did you hear the one about the elephant with a screwdriver? me neither...

Why did the boy jump off a bridge? Because he saw it on tv

What do you call five black me pushing a car? "Very nice young men who helped me when I broke down," according to my grandmother.

On monday morning the doctor walked into a patient's room, then he walked out after a quick check up.

Why couldnt the girl braid her hair? She had cancer

Like a bit of a cozy fight or something.

A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

How do you ask a blonde out to dinner? Politely

Friend's sister: how many seconds are in 12 o'clock Friend: alot Friend's sister: WELL THEN 12 O'CLOCK IS A REWERJAJSBDKDJDHRJRJFHFKRJRIDBDKSBSDJ *slams door*

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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