I am so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed.

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Maybe You'll Find Someone Else To Help You... Maybe Black Mesa... That Was A Joke...Haha...Fat Chance...

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Have ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither has she.

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What did the Icelandic man say to the Norwegian man? Vishtok yerder poten hash vil narsh varden.

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I have two friends, Jeffrey and Barbara. You might think that Jeffrey likes sports and beer, and that Barbara likes knitting and cooking. But you'd be wrong, Barbara is dead.

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What do you get when you cross a child and jt Rape

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Trees are my friends because they welcome me with open limbs.

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Whats worse than being a black guy? NOTHING.

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Q.Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A.Because chickens weren't invented then.

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A man gets pushed in to a pole...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the horrors of factory farming.

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Why did the joke feel paranoid? Because everyone kept laughing at him.

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What two states don't have running water? Solid and gas

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Knock Knock Who's there? Me!! .... me who? Just open the motherf***ing door!! MOM!?! Theres a rapist at the door. MOM: No Jimmy, thats your father

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Q-Jetski A-How is olive oil made?

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No, Trinidad.

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Prince of bell air with Keanu Reeves: SMIIIIIIIIIIITH! DID YOU DESTROY MY COUCH? Neo: ... WELL DID YOU BOTHER CARLTON DOING HIS STUFF? Neo... Will you shut up then? ... Intro: This, is my story, read the text, thank you.

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A woman walked into a club. Or at least, that's what her abusive boyfriend told the police.

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Up High. *high fives* In The Middle *high fives* Down Low *high fives* In the Grass *high fives* You've been diagnosed with prostate cancer.

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Why is Diarreah genetic? It runs in your genes.

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Why did the chair fall off the cliff? Well it is an inamitate object so it did not move itself, someone must have threw it

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Q. What is the fastest animal in the world? A. An Ethiopian chicken.

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A woman walks into a bar. Guys aren't the only ones walking into bars.

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How did the black guy swim across the Atlantic? He didn't. He was prepared to, but then went on Expedia and found a ticket with Continental Airlines that was in his budget. He did not like the amount of service he recieved, and decided in the future he will save up and fly with a different company, or in fact swim across.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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