Why was the gorilla crying? His brother died

how do you make a joke act like yourself

Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

Oh look, I've found my knife

Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

what do you call skiediving? a very fun but moderatly dangerouse sport that many people have fun doing from the ages of 19 to 31

What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

Knock knock Who's there? Timmy Timmy who? Timmy Smith

A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

A cow walks into a bar and says, "moo."

How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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