What has four wheels and can fly? A flying car What else has four wheels and can fly? Another flying car

What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

Why was Jenny walking home alone from school? Because three years ago her parents were murdered brutally by a drug dealer and social services haven't yet realised that Jenny is still living in the empty house.

Punch line.

My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

Q. What's silver and cries? A. Someone who's been stabbed while wearing a suit of armour.

what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

What's invisible and smells like a carrot? A rabbit's fart.

Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

What is one plus one? I don't want to do math.

What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

whats worse than ten dead babies in one trashcan? one dead baby in ten trashcans

What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

a muslim walks into a bar, he then remembers his religion forbids the drinking of alcohol and walks back out

I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

Patient: Doctor, will I be able to play the piano when my arm heals? Doctor: Did I not tell you? You insurance didn't cover the cost of this operation. Your arm is never going to be healed!

what does the pope have against homosexuals a whip

Limericks are fun, I have an orange Nothing rhymes with orange crap orange

What did the school bully get for his birthday? Beaten by his alcoholic father. Children are a product of their environment and his father's abusive nature towards his son forced the young boy to act out in class giving him the reputation of a bully.

here's a joke a black man goes in a store and buy something

What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings

What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

Why was the blonde so stupid? He had dyslexia and to make fun of his hardship would truly be a hardship of human morals.

poo poo you you doo doo too too

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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