Why did Timmy stay home on the day of the big test at the public school? He was homeschooled

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An incoming freshman introduces himself to his Ethics professor by saying, "What's up?" To which the professor responds, "You should never end a sentence with a preposition." The freshman, who is both clever and witty, quickly responds to his future Professor, saying: "Professor, I practice linguistic description, such that I observe language objectively in a way that does not adhere strictly to grammatical and syntactic dogma". The professor, surprised by the student's philosophical disposition, engages the student in a highly constructive dialogue about the philosophy of language, from which both the student and teacher learn more about each other and themselves.

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tell ur mom i love her before i die this would have been a better ending to the tintanic

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can A hundred dead babies in a trash can Whats worse than a hundred dead babies in a trash can A live one at the bottom Whats worse than that It eats it way out Whats worse than that It brings friends

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When god hands you lemons .. you find a new god.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to fix a lightbulb? Lets go ride bikes.

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What do men like most of all? Let's not lie, BOOBIES!

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two people are falling out of a plane, a blond and a brunnete who hit the ground first. the blond, the brunnete brought a parachute

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What is worse than Shaq's free throw percentage? The free throw percentages of Reggie Evans, Bo Outlaw, Andris Biedrins, Wilt Chamberlain, Chris Dudley and Ben Wallace.

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How do you make someone laugh at a funeral? Laughing gas How do you make someone cry at a birthday party? Tear gas How do you make someone high at a wedding? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - There are many ways to get high in a wedding. Gas is not the only option.

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Why was the Tyrannosaurus Rex such an aggressive animal? it had short arms so it could not masturbate.

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Roses are red violets are blue I am in 301 Club and so are you.

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What did michael say to sam? (pedo face) YEH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

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What's two plus two? Window

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Why are there so many black men in the NBA? Because they trained hard and practiced regularly to get there..

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A mailman walks into a bar He delivers a bill for the electricity and leaves.

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Roses are white, Violets are white, holy shit i can see the light.

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What's brown and rhymes with poop? Dr. Dre.

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Wright flyer

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Teacher- What comes after 69 Boy- Mouthwash?? Teacher- LEAVE!

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What has potential but is in fact disappointing? This joke.

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What's bigger than a horse ? An elephant.

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Can a nine iron? No, but a tucan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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