q- what do you call a small number of black people running away from a large group of white people? a- every marathon known to man...

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Guess what What

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denisssssssssssssss

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What squirts out of your butt and runs down your leg? Bloody diarrhea.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Why did the black guy buy a jug of grape soda Because he was thirsty

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Why are Chinese people short? Chinese people are often exposed to harmful chemicals because of lax environmental laws, and suffer from poor nutrition.

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Prince of bell air with Keanu Reeves: SMIIIIIIIIIIITH! DID YOU DESTROY MY COUCH? Neo: ... WELL DID YOU BOTHER CARLTON DOING HIS STUFF? Neo... Will you shut up then? ... Intro: This, is my story, read the text, thank you.

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Why does Miley Cyrus make sex tapes It's the only acting job she can get

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what did one computer say to the other .........

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The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out if the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, Monkey do.

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What do you get when John pulls your toe off the waterfall and takes three from an caramel? -6 to the power of golf.

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What she says: “You’re really sweet, but I have a boyfriend.” What she means: “You’re really sweet, but I definitely don’t want to date you.”

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Q: What did the skeleton order when he walked into a bar? A: A beer and a mop.

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Why couldn't the blonde write the number eleven? She was paralyzed.

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Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

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What happens when a black man is alone the KKK appears

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How do you make a baby float? Two scopes of Ice cream and two scopes of baby.....and the holocaust.

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What happened when the blind man was running toward a cliff. He stopped before he fell.

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Why was the man scared? Because he was being attacked by a giant tiger.

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God is the English name given to a singular being in theistic and deistic religions who is either the sole deity in monotheism, or a single deity in polytheism. He (I use the term 'He' as it is the most common conception) is said to be omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent, and omnibenevolent. I highly doubt he will give you lemons.

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Did the owl ever reach the middle of the tootsie pop? Yes. Dreams do come true

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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