Doctor Doctor i've got wind can you give me something? Thats not wind the doctor replies thats a rare form of stomach cancer.

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A man goes to his doctor and says, "Help me, my wife thinks she's a chicken." The doctor recommends a nearby psychiatrist to analyze the wife's mental instability, and inevitably she is housed in an insane asylum. The husband commits suicide.

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What word rhymes with orange? -Adult onset diabetes

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A man crashed his boat and is lost in the ocean. He comes across a cruise ship, and they ask if he wants help. The man says, "No. God will save me, but thanks anyway." Later on that night, he is eaten by a shark.

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whats a diffrence between a bench and a black person the bench is a thing a black person is a human being

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Want to get shot? Go to Virginia Tech. Too Soon?

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When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

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Elephants can jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

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Did you hear about the kid from Texas? He shot his campus up.

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Why did the kid give a bad presentation in class? He knew basically nothing about the topic, and on top of that had a large erection.

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Why didnt the homeless man eat the cheese? Because he died right before he ate it. :-(

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how do people without arms and legs have sex? no one has sex with people without arms and legs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

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I haven't left my basement in 29 years

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Compton

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What is the only day of the year when you're guaranteed to find me? The day I kill you.

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An American, a French man, and Jew were all in an airplane about to skydive. Their skydiving instructor comes out and says, "I'm sorry, there seems to've been a mistake and we only have two parachutes." The company refunds them, and they, while reasonably disappointed, agree to reschedule the lesson.

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what do you call a black man that killed somebody? a murderer.

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Q: What's your dog's name ? A: Dog. Q: What's your cat's name ? A: Cat. Q: What's your dick's name A: Pinky

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You: Hey, I have a good knock knock joke, here, you start! -and if all goes well...- Them: Knock knock! You:Who's there? Them: Uhh...

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What smells worse than cow manure? Burning Jews.

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What happened when the man lost his sandwich? He couldnt eat.

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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