whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

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what's blue and white and red all over? -nothing the "red all over" part implies a contradiction to blue and white.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

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Dislike this!!!!!!

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What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

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Knock knock Who's there? Labrinth Come in

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What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

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My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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how many indians does it take to screw in a light bulb? one if it can reach 2 if it's high.One to screw in the bulb the other to hold the ladder.

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Burger King cashier: Are you on Team Jacob or Team Edward? Man: I'm on team I'm freaking hungry; now give me my food!

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What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

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Q. Why do Puerto Ricans throw their trash away in clear plastic bags? A. So Italians can go window shopping.

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guy 1... "do you no any funny jokes?" guy2 ..."no" guy1 ..."same"

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I've got a boner

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How come the black man couldn't be seen on film? He could be seen on film, he's not a vampire.

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Where do you put a black jew? In the back of the.... oh wait i have never seen a black jew before.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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Knock, Knock The door's open

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your mama is so stupid i believe she will have a difficult time finding employment in these rough economic times

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What does a turkey do? I don't know I'm not a turkey

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

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What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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