"I can't wait to eat this bagle!" "Yes you can." "Yeah, I guess you're right."

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Caitlyn.

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I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

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What did one guy in the bar say to the other? Hi.

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Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

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Whats the difference between and anti joke and a joke? There two different things.

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a guy who can fly walks up a hill and jumps off a cliff. his flying power fails him and he dies on impact

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Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

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Why did Nicholas Cage cross the street? To steal the Declaration of Independence.

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what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

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what does the pope have against homosexuals a whip

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What do you call a horse with no eyes? A horse with no eyes.

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how did the bloop cross the road? to get to the other side

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how many blondes does it take to fix a lightbulb? 764,983,792,545,653,

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What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

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Why is it hard to fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

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Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage.

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Why did the blind man cross the road? To end the suffering of a lifetime illness.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? People leading healthy, active lives physically and socially.

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What's invisible and smells like a carrot? A rabbit's fart.

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Boom.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravitational force acted upon the monkey who was not holding on to any branch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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