Did you hear the one about the koala bear that fell out of the tree? Yeah it died.

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What did the 80 year old man do to celebrate valentines day with his wife? Nothing, Alzheimer's made him forget about Valentines day.....and that he was married. What did his wife do for Valentines day? Killed herself.

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My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

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Why didn't Johnny ride his bike to school? Both of his legs were amputated. He can't ride a bike ever again.

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Your mother is so fat that when she sits around the house, she feels bad about herself but is too embarrassed to get a gym membership and work-out in public.

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What do you call a black guy who works at McDonald's? A worker, you racist piece of shit!

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Whats worse than sourcraut? Casey Anthony.

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why did it take the black man 1.5 hours to get out of a movie theater? he wanted to patiently wait for the movie to end.

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a preist sees a rabbi on the street while taking a walk. he says hi and proceeds to have a nice conversation as they are good friends despite their religous differences

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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knock knock whose there? my penis.

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What do the angels say when god sneezes? Chuck bless you

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Two black guys jump off a bridge..who lands first? They would land at the same time due to earths gravity acting on them both with an equal force.

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Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: Because he was shot in the face

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What do a black man and an elephant have in common? They are both multi-cellular organisms, they both belong to the kingdom Animalia, the phylum Chordata, and the class Mammalia, they both possess vertebrae, they both move through legged locomotion, they both possess knee joints and they both possess the capacity for altruistic behavior.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To pick up the carcass of its road-killed younger brother and weep.

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Sex with people under twelve years/MONTHS? You think I am a pervert or something? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: DAMN STRAIGHT I AM! People use to tell me they know I am good on the inside... Joke is on them, I I fool them all by being slightly kind on the outside!

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One dark, stormy night, there was a man, limping slowly down the road. He looked across the road and noticed a little girl on a park bench. He carefully moved around behind , creeped up, and slowly tapped her on the shoulder. I tap 2 tap 3 tap The little girl slowly turned her head, and as she did, the man uttered 3 sentences.... "Would you mind helping me get back to my apartment, my hand was cut off in the war, while I was serving my country, which is why I have a hook as opposed to a hand. I was heading back to my apartment to greet my wife and 2 little children, since I just got back from a long day's work at the soup kitchen, helping those in need, and I sprained my ankle. By the way, my name I John Thompson."

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A blonde, a brunette and a red head are having a discussion on current issues. The brunette says she would like to see improvements in the environment. The red head says she would like to see the economy prosper. The blonde says she has to take a poop.

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What is a Mexican's favorite holiday? Christman

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why was the boy sad? because his penis was stapled to a coffee table

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

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knock knock whos there steve i dont know you go away

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why didn't the chicken cross the road ? because half way acroos he got hit by a car and the animal heath care had to take him away and put him down

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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