Why did sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally

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Q: What happened when the Mexican went to the doctors? A: He was diagnosed with depression.

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what do you call a bird that is gay bird a gaybird

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how come timmy didnt brush his teeth he didnt have a toothbrush

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your mama so fat she has a low self esteem

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Whats Black and White and Red all over ? A Zebra laying in a pool of its own blood.

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what do a heater and a dead baby have in common? a dead baby is only warm for a small period of time

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An Admiral walks into Ackbar...

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What is the biggest lie in the world How the **** should I know

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Why did my pussy get wet? Because I splashed him with water. LOL SO FUNNY OMFG DA BEST JOKE EVA!!

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Where did the boy go after the explosion? Everywhere

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awkies when jamie and jacob hook up, and u have to tell the dog..i maen danni that this has been going on for 2 months

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Q. Why was six afraid of seven? A. Because seven raped a three year-old child.

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks: "why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus being incapable of comprehending the complexities of conversation said nothing, and shit all over the floor.

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Q: What's your dog's name ? A: Dog. Q: What's your cat's name ? A: Cat. Q: What's your dick's name A: Pinky

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Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they stink.

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What is the difference between a baby and a rat? I don't have a rat in a cage

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A man walks into a bar, he asks if the bartender knows where Starbucks is. The bartender finds this exceptable and shows him the way.

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What is the difference between Barack Obama and Simba from the Lion King? One is a cartoon character from a beloved Disney classic and the other is the current President of the United States of America.

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Q:Why are all of the vampires extinct? A:AIDS is a serious disease. You shouldn't joke about it.

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A deaf lion tried to kill a zebra. It succeeded.

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Roses are roses Violets are violets Sugar is sugar And you're a person

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Your dad is so hairy, that he shaves to look more cleanly.

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?  The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that :  L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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