Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a passing car.

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Boy, do I love chicken strips. Sometimes, when I’m home alone, I’ll take some chicken strips fresh out of the oven and rub them in my scalp. It doesn’t do much for my hair health, but I like the way they feel running through my strands of hair. The flakey coating, smooth white meat, and warmth. Yum.

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How much dub could a dubstep dub if a dubstep could step dub?

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When an intellectual was told by someone, "Your beard is now coming in," he went to the rear entrance and waited for it. Another intellectual asked what he was doing. Once he heard the whole story, he said: "I'm not surprised that people say we lack common sense. How do you know that it's not coming in by the other gate?"

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Q) What do you call a black president? A) Mr. President

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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A guy walks into a bar. NOT!

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So much with being an author... You with the Feds? The CIA?

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It's valentines today! My girlfriend died.

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what do u do if a women serves you lunch in the living room? u tighten the chain!!!!!!

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You know whats better than 24? 25

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What's ugly and has shit smeared over its teeth? Smelly McD (He also wears bin bag clothes)

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Yo mamas so ugly that when she looked out the window, she was arrested for mooning.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Why did the guy in the wheelchair die? He was mauled by tigers.

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How can you tell if a blonde has been using your computer? Ask her.

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Did you hear about the woman that died of a heart attack? More oxygen for us!

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Your mom is so stupid she has to get homeschooled for college!

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What's worst than your computer breaking? Your face

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What time is it when it is time to get a watch? About 4:30, unless its a monday.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Because he's blind.

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell off and bumped his head Mama called the doctor and the doctor said "There is no cure for the monkeys in your head"

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, his mouth was full of it's intestines.

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roses are red violets are blue, every 1 looks at you and call u a fool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops