What did the blind man say to the deaf man? Can you speak up? I cant hear you!

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what did batman say to robin to tell him to get in the car? get in.

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How do you stop an asshole from being an asshole toward you? Shoot him in the head.

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How do you tell a bunch of Chinese people apart? Go up to each one and ask them their first and last names. The chances of any of them being the same is quite slim, giving each person their own identity.

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How did the little boy fall off his bycicle? Prior to this incident, a psychopathetic killer murdered his family. Therefore, to escape the killer, the boy got onto his bycicle in hopes of manuvering away from the threat. Since it was nighttime he did not notice the fault in the asphalt.( No ryhme intendid.) From flipping over his handlebars, he fell unconcious. Upon the killer spotting the boy, he sliced his head off and left the scene to not be spotted by police.

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Q: What do you call a girl who wears a tuxedo to prom? A: Comfortable with the way she looks.

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1 out of every 3 relationships someone is cheating, I wonder if it was my wife or my girlfriend

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Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

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Why did the man write with a pen on paper? Because he was writing a novel.

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That's what SHE said!

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— Knock knock. — Who's there? — Funny. — Funny who? — A funny joke.

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why was the blonde confused? because she was born with a low IQ making her mentally retarded.

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A woman walks into a bar and asks for a duck. The bartender is confused, assumes the women has some sort of mental problem, and treats her nicely, as his sister suffers from Down's Syndrome.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer Roses are red

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Why did the fat man hit the ground before the skinny man? Because he jumped first.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Bailiffs.

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What's the warmest organ in a dead baby's body? My penis

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So a guy walks into a bar. Ouch. It was a gay bar.

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What is three times more dangerous than war? Three Wars.

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Knock Knock! whos there? Me! I kill you!

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The WNBA.

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Excuses are like assholes: Gay men like to have sex with them.

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What is the difference between a feminist and a gun? A gun only has one trigger

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whats funnier than womens rights? ottos weight

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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