What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

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Guy 1: "Hey, you have some updawg on your face." Guy 2: "Oh, thanks. Did I get it?" Guy 1: "Yeah, I think so."

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A guy and a girl had sex, it was casual.

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In Soviet Russia, there are communists.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

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If you lose your left arm, your right one will be left.

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What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Why was the old lady hard of hearing? She spent many of her young days blasting hard rock from her speakers/

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds? They're of legal age to give consent.

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Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

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What's brown and smells Iike crap? My brother he doesn't shower and is Hispanic

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???????????? WTF?

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A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

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Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

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the world flooded and everybody died how did they die? the all fell into lava!

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whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

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Women's Rights

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how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

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Two people on a boat, Pete and Repete. Pete fell off and Repete radioed the Coast Guard, who sadly got there just in time to watch him drown to his death.

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A mother and father heard their young son sobbing in his room, so they ran upstairs to see what the problem was. When they got to his room, they found the older son was dead and hanging from the ceiling. And the younger son was actually laughing, not crying.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

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My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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