Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

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Q: Why MohammadReza Is a Bitch? A: Because he isnt a whore

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What is marios favorite type of jeans? a brand that he enjoys and feels is comfortable in

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Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Weiner? A: You can never make "fetch" happen.

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Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

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What is big, green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree and hit you in the head, it will probably kill you? A pool table.

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3 men find a genie lamp on the side of a road, The genie grants them each a wish as they surely deserve. The first man asks for a jet and the genie glady grants him this and the man starts to fly away. The second man says to make a wall around asia and the genie complies. The third man thinks for a minute and finally says fill it with water and as a genie the genie cannot refuse. They all drowned seeing how the jet had no fuel. The genie goes back to sleep and is picked up by an alien 5,000 years in the future, the Earth is destroyed in 7012(as if we didnt already destroy it). The genie survives and currently resides on uranus.

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whats the main reason Mexicans have legs? so they can stand.

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A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

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What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

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What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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poop.

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Did you see that picture of Helen Keller's dad? Yes. She didn't.

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In Soviet Russia, there are communists.

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What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

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What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? Aye, ye be thinkin' it to be "ARRRR" - but it be the C

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist.

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Snapple fact #572: You're a terrible person.

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My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

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what did one lady say to another lady? we are both ladies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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