What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when riding on a roller coaster.

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i did not type this on 12/23/11 at 8:49:47

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, penis.

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Caitlyn.

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a blind man walks into a bar it hurt.

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot. *BOOM* Never mind, he was a terrorist.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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If at first you don't succeed.... maybe skydiving isn't for you...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cactus cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens butt.

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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The pig walks up to the buture the' The buture sloters him!

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It's black, and when it falls out of a tree, your refrigurator is broken. Your refrigurator.

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Which came first the egg or the chicken? The chicken because eggs can't cross the road

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smug face >:}

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(insert antijoke here

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Why was the blonde so stupid? He had dyslexia and to make fun of his hardship would truly be a hardship of human morals.

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Whats pink and looked like an angry bulldog? Your moms vagina last night

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this site is funny.

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What's black without keys. A keyboard after you hit it with a shovel.

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When life gives you oranges, make lemonade.

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Hey buddy what's up? I justed wanted to know if you wanted to hang out tonight. Just call me and tell me what you wanna do. Ok that's it see ya. Oh yeah! I gave your mom an STD...sorry dude...it just happened. I hope your dad isn't mad. Again, really sorry. Ok bye.

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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree? Lean a ladder against the tree and reassure them if they are apprehensive.

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How did the soccer team win? They scored the most goals.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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