Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

Caitlyn.

Hey buddy what's up? I justed wanted to know if you wanted to hang out tonight. Just call me and tell me what you wanna do. Ok that's it see ya. Oh yeah! I gave your mom an STD...sorry dude...it just happened. I hope your dad isn't mad. Again, really sorry. Ok bye.

What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot. *BOOM* Never mind, he was a terrorist.

A guy walks into a bar. Ouch

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cactus cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens butt.

What's black and white and red all over. An interracial suicide pact.

how much blow can charlie sheen hold up his nose? enough to kill Two and A Half Men

Whats is pathetic and just plain sad? Gas prices these days.

Limericks are fun, I have an orange Nothing rhymes with orange crap orange

What?

Chuck Norris was walking down the street when he was confronted by an armed, very desperate street robber. Chuck unfortunately made the decision to defend himself, and was shot in the gut before he could complete a roundhouse kick. The robber then took his wallet and ran off, undoubtedly to buy drugs.

Why did the postal worker go to work? Because he has to support his family so they do not starve like his dog.

What's the difference between a black guy and a door? Various answers are acceptable. The door has hinges, a black guy has legs, etc.

A: Knock knock! B: A: Guess no one's home.

What do you call ten black men running down the street? A race.

read down and see what it is like BEFOR MARRIAGE boy:at last.i can hardly wait! girl:do you want to leave me? boy:NO! dont even think about it! girl:do you love me? boy:ofcourse! always girl:have you ever cheated on me? boy:NO! why are you even asking? girl:will you kiss me ? boy:every chance i get! girl:will you hit me ? boy:hell no! are you crazy ? girl:can i trust you? boy:yes! girl:darling!! read up again and see what it is like AFTER MARRIAGE (L.W)

a blind man walks into a bar it hurt.

Q: How did Muhamid Ali ( casius clay ) get a black eye? A: He was born

A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

Whats the difference between a chicken? One of its legs are both the same.

Why did lil yazzy watch The Hills at 12:40 in the morning? Because she was casually surfing netflix and clicked on it.

One day a horse goes to a bakery store and asks the shopkeeper for a fresh loaf of bread. Surprised at the request the shopkeeper asked - White bread or whole wheat? To which the horse replied - Makes no difference cause i rode my bicycle to work yesterday.

What do you call a guy who has sex with kids? A child molester

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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