Knock Knock! Who's there? ....Mrs Murray silently returned to her armchair, a single tear rolling down her weathered cheek. Her lonely existence deepened, as she realised the gang of boys had fooled her again.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? All of it.

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A unicorn, a smart blonde, a dragon, and a hobo are in a maze who gets out first? The hobo. The other 3 don't exist. By Adam Chebali

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How do you get your girlfriend to become more enthusiastic about swallowing? Stick your dick in Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia ice cream.

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Roses are dead Violets are too Were all gonna die So are you.

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Why did the turkey cross the road? His friend, the chicken, had just been hit by a passing car.

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Why was the man sad? He was molested as a child.

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And so the Lord said unto John "Come forth and receive eternal life," but John came fifth, and won a toaster instead.

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What do you get if you put a lepper in front of a fan A mess

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joke hahhahahah where did u find that joke, on the internet

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What's black, white, and red all over??? A penguin in a blender.

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Q: What do you call men at sea? A: Sailors

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compardre No Pew.. Pew.. At mi OINK.. OINKs...

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Why was the mime crying? Her husband died.

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Firgen and the blung brigade

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What's the best sound in the world? Children screaming

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted to get to the other side! why did the chipmunk cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

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Every day thousands of pets and animals are beaten, neglected and abused.

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Why doesn't little jimmy ride his favourite bike to school any more? He was playing on the platform at at the railway station, tripped and fell across the track, at which point a seven carriage train came through at over 150 mph and cut through his upper thighs crushing everything in his legs and causing them to fall off.

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Whats bloody and is dead. My son.

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If Apple made a house, would it have Windows?

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stephen hawking walks into a bar, and those who recognize him are shocked that he's no longer in his wheelchair, and approach him to let him know this, but it turns out they were wrong, it was just a man with similar facial features to stephen hawking.

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Superman vs Batman real fight: Batman: Hmm I believe that Superman might want to fight m*squish* Batman explodes in a bunch of meat as a blue and red blur is seen fly by. Extended Edition: Batman: Hah Superman I got kryptonite gloves so if you would just stand close to them for about five minute...*squish* Batsack of meat left we see nothing because Superman is FASTER THAN A SPEEDING BULLET. They are probably gonna go like every fucking crossover, first they squabble and throw a few punches for five minutes, then they realize that the LAX LADDER LEX LUGER AND LEX LUTHOR brothers made up some fake story so sups and bts kill each other while they blow up the world, so Btz, and Soup end up beating them up... Moral: "PFF! BATMAN HAS BEATEN UP SUPERMAN AND THE HULK IN THOUSANDS OF SHlTTY NON CANON STORIES!" (In where the one with the Hulk described the hulk to have the instincts and combat skills of a "dumb, animal like confused ape" yes actual quote, Batman punched this confused green ape across a door and kept beating "The Hulk" up as he ran around in "animalistic fear and "rage" receiving random kicks by Batman, then Btz throws some capsule that turns into a fishbowl with no oxygen that chokes The Hulk (supposedly to death) in a few seconds... The Hulk can like hold his breath for YEARS in space, (but you know these lethal fishbowls)

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Two muffins were in the oven...They were taken out after about 40 minutes, and then enjoyed by all.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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