In mother Russia you don't eat cookie. Dog eat shark. -B.Gill

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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what do you call a black person who hated fried chicken? a vegetarian.

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A bear comes across some people on a camping trip. But he then promptly leaves, because bears aren't inherently aggressive unless caring for their young or if they are provoked.

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6 was afraid of 7 because 7 8 9

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What's brown and sticky? Anal

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How do you become a dragon ball super saiyan? You sit there and scream like you are giving birth for three minuets

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why did the little boy start to cry? because his parents didn't love him

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How do you know if elephants are watching a movie? If a Volkswagen Beetle is parked outside the movie house.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What starts with F and ends in UCK? Firetruck. What starts with P and ends in ORN? Popcorn. What starts with S and ends in HIT? Shit.

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Two muffins are being baked in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin "Boy, it sure is getting hot in here," and the other muffin replies "yeah, that's because it's an oven."

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A brown park bench was bought. After multiple years the color had faded, and the bench was no longer the same shade of brown.

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What do you call Willy Wonka when he is in Colorado? Willy Colorado.

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Benjamin Frankin was playing with his Xbox...

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Why did the butcher have blood on his hands? He murdered his daughter.

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What do you get when you watch Cinderella backwards? A woman who learns her place.

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Wuts brown and smelly? Brown smelly stuff.

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A bear and a furry bunny rabbit were in the woods. The bear ate the rabbit..

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Jokes about the Holocaust

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A man walks in the a bar Now he has 3 missing teeth

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Why did a man throw butter out the window ? So he could see butter fly and then realized that there was one on window cil

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a dog, Meow.

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What did the cool guy say to Kelly Clarkson? Nothing, she's fat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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