Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? She's dead.

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My Butthole.

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Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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Womans baksetball...

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Why don't mummies take vacations? They're dead.

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Last week, one of my ex girlfriends called me. She said she had to tell me some bad news. "I don't know how to tell you this but I have AIDS. I really didn't know how to reply to that so I said the only thing I could say. "Yeah, I know."

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What do you get when you cross Winter Squash, Beets, Ham, Coffee, Spinach, Hexamine, Cadmium, Detergent, and some love? A bowl full of crap.

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I own two ferrets. I was merely stating something factual.

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So a Jewish Family wakes into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

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You know what really grinds my gears? Insufficient lubricant.

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sweating like antoni with a girl

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why did the man hop everywhere? He only had one leg

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Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

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What's worse than finding the Holocaust in your apple? Nothing

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What happend to the Jew when he was near the fire place He very carefully tended to it

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jibby jobby

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A human walked into a bar, The bartender quacked, "quack quack quack" The human wondered why all the patrons and the bartender were ducks, so he left the bar, before his head spontaneously exploded.

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Why did the black guy buy watermelon? It was on sale.

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Why was the boy eating lunch by himself at school? Because his only friend was hit by a train.

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Q: What did the duck say to the bartender? A: Nothing considering that ducks cannot speak

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What did the jewish boy get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What happened when rudolf bucked Santa? Santa ripped his hooves off and started hitting his nose until it stopped glowing

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Q: Why do homeless people smell bad? A: Because they live on the street and they dont take showers it's very sad sometimes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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