A pirate walks into a bar, and the bartender asks, "why do you have a wheel in your pants?"

Q. Whats black and rhymes with Snoop? A. Dr Dre

A White, a Mexican, and a Chinese guy all take a boat to go exploring.

I put children on a leash and store them under my bed. I feed them bird food and they drink eachothers urine.

Why did the little girls ice cream melt? Because she was on fire.

Why did they save the man in a burning building? To arrest him for arson.

how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

What's got one leg and no eyes? A leg.

Wiggle wiggle wiggle yeah

Why was David sad? Because he got his head stuck in a window.

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? statutory rape

Why was the dinosaur laughing so hard? He heard a very humorous joke

Asian women drivers...

What do you call a dog with no legs? A dog.

I remember my days you know in the army, agfanifuckingstan, got dirty water, then spent a week shitting... Anyway, I was holding a grenade right? And then two of them came around and I was like "here come good boy! GOOOD BOY! Catch the ball!" And then I pulled the pin and threw it. Aww shut up, you are all like "YOU SOLDIER KILL PUPPIES!" NO THOSE WHERE KIDS! And they would have been like 15 today and been killing your men today! YOU ARE SO FUCKING WELCOME!

Knock knock Shut up

What's worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trash can 1 baby in 10 trash cans

19 roosters walk into a roller coaster

Roses are dead. Violets are dead. I'm a bad gardener.

If life gives you lemons.... Life is an abstract noun not a physical object so it can not give you lemons.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

Want to hear a funny joke? Not really.

Why is the sky blue? Because it isn't red.

Once a man asked a lady working at the supermarket, Can I see your avocados? She kindly walked him over to the rack where they were being held.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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