Knock knock. Who's there? FedEx. FedEx who? Just kidding, it's hookers.

What did one cat say to another? Cats cant talk

why do they sparkle?!?!?!?!

what did the kid with poleo get for christmas. whatever he has on his christmas list because his parents feel bad for passing down the genetic information(DNA) that gave him poleo.

What's worse than accidentally flooding your bathroom? A Tsunami

Remember when the new jokes on this sight actually used to be funny?

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

Why did Timmy stay home on the day of the big test at the public school? He was homeschooled

how much could a wood-chuck chuck if a wood-chuck could chuck wood? it doesnt matter because they can not chuck wood

Q. When you drink two 5 hour energies, do you get 10 hours of energy or double the energy for 5 hours? A. You die

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was baked.

What did the dog say to the other dog? Were both dogs!

What did the boy do with his ice cream? He ate it.

How do you kill a retard? you shoot him in the head

Why was the cook arrested? Tax evasion.

If your riding a jet ski and the wheels fall off Then how many pancakes does it take to Cover a dog house Purple because ice cream doesn't have Any bones

It's long!

It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

What happened to that guy who fell? He died from car accident 3 days later.

Q: why was the man punched in the face? A: I did like him.

Vaginal secretions

An elephant stomped on a mouse. What did the mouse say? Ouch.

You life story is the perfect cure for insomnia. [L]

Roses are Blue Violets are Red I'm not creative Roses are Blue

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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