What's the difference between a pair of slippers and a pair of dead babies? Essentially nothing.

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How much dub could a dubstep dub if a dubstep could step dub?

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your mom is so fat, she stepped on the scale and said, "I really need to eat better and I'm thinking about getting a gym membership." She did so, and she lost so much weight that all her friends congratulated her everywhere she went, and some didn't even recognize her.

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What's the difference between car keys and truck keys? Literally nothing.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why did the boy run down the road? Because he was being chased by a tsunami

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Q-what did the black man say before he crossed the road? A-i wanna cross the road.

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What does Mr. Newell have? - Diabetes. Mr. Newell has diabetes.

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, his mouth was full of it's intestines.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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Why didn't the family finish their picnic? Because a dog was sick all over the food.

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Half koala, half walrus, behold...the Koalrus!

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Did you hear about the woman that died of a heart attack? More oxygen for us!

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Your mom is so stupid she has to get homeschooled for college!

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Elephant. Elephant who? Seatbelt.

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What's the difference between oreos and your opinion? I asked for your opinion.

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So a horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" It proceeds to then crap on the floor and walk out,because its a horse.

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I'm not sure if you share videos, but this is a great anti-joke vid. Thank you for the consideration. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KHydNGR9rrg

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Chuck Norris can right-click with a mac mouse

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Someone clearly messed up on naming the flower. Violet is synonymous with purple, Which is obviously NOT blue; It's the mixture between blue and red.

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Yo mama so fat when she sat around the hous she sat AROUND the house

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A white, black, jewish, and hispanic person apply for a job as an accountant who gets the job? One of them.

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What time is it when it is time to get a watch? About 4:30, unless its a monday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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