- Anti Joke

There once was a man from Peru, he couldn't fit into his shoe. He went to Brazil bought a big. Swallowed it and died.

Why did Bob get off the swing? Because he was done.

Whats bad about a black cop coming to your house? I was having a KKK meeting in the basement.

penis likes vagina cuz its straight (get it?? it has an erection!!!!!!)

What did the starving kid say to the starving parent? Pineapple

A nhiger walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand. "do you have any lemonade" the man said "no. we don't serve nhigers lemonade. but you can drink your own piss boy, thats home made.." the nhiger waddled away (waddle waddle) till the very next day. The nhiger walked up to the lemonade stand with a lawsuit file right in his hand and said "you are legally required to serve me lemonade" the man said "fu(k you nhiger go back to where you came go back to Africa it's full of aids" the nhiger said "goodbye".... i'm too lazy too finish this off so i'll spoil the ending, the nhiger was actually a smelly pakistanian, which was actually a dirty chi-nk in costume. let's just say lawsuits were filed but the lemonade stand owner had casey anthony's lawyer and in the end never had to serve fu-cking nhiger ,smelly pakies or dirty chin-ks again :) The End. Happily Ever After.

You are in an airplane, and you have 500 bricks. You throw one out the door. How many do you have? 499. What are the 3 steps to putting an elephant in a fridge? 1-open the door,2-put the elephant in,3-close the door. How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? You open the door, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in, and shut the door. The lion king is having a party for all the animals… which one didn't go? The giraffe, it's in the fridge. An old lady is trying to cross an alligator infested river. She makes it over. How? The alligators are at the party. She dies anyway. How? She gets hit by the brick you threw out of the window.

Roses are multicoloured Violets are multicoloured Mushrooms are great

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

What is Colder than a witch's tit? Not much. It was removed for biopsy and kept in the pathology freezer. At absolute zero.

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

Ill admit it Nero, although you act like a savage you make a fine statement there, maybe we will ask her to join one time huh?

Ryan Holden is a faggot.

why do we have school? 2 learn duh y r u even askin? ur STOOPIDE!

What did Billy say when he met the president? Nice to meat you Mr. President? -Louis

I <3 Hitler

what do you call 69 babies in one room? a room full of babies

Me - "Wanna hear something that will make me laugh?" giggles friend - "Sure." teehee if anyone gets it.

What's the best way to suprise your friend? Shove a banana up his ass.

If I have a penny, and I give it to Michael Jackson, What will he do with it? Nothing. He's dead.

ALCATRAZ IS REOPENED!

Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

Do you like cheese? Yes. Okay.

Girl goes to see a sex therapist. Girl says, "Doc, though this has never been a problem, for the past 3 months I have been unable to reach climax. Can you help me?" Doc says, "Yes.". And after an intense 18 months of therapy the doctor helped the girl to discover that her inability to reach climax was related to issues of childhood sexual abuse. And after another 36 months of therapy the girl finally found the courage to confront and forgive her unrepentant abuser, as she realized that by not forgiving him, it was like drinking poison while hoping that he would die. And though the doctor did help her,as he had said, the girl never regained her ability to reach climax again.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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