Who visits Satan on Christmas? A dyslexic box.

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What did the dead man say? Nothing because dead human beings have no beating heart and do not live so they cannot speak.

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Why did the quick brown fox jump in the lake? He did not see lake on the other side of the lazy dog.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She didn't. Despite losing her arms in a terrible accident as a child, Suzy persevered to become a renowned gymnast. After several turns as a champion Special Olympian, Suzy retired from sports in order to tour elementary schools as a guest speaker. She inspired thousands of disabled children across North America and was a highly-respected orator. Suzy sadly passed away in 2009 at the age of 62. She is survived by her two lovely daughters, Karen and Michelle.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Your neighbor.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding half of regis philbin in your apple...

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69

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s

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that moment when the last few ceral are like "Come on catch me bitch"

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What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? ProtestS from Anti GM activists.

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A pig walks into a bar and says, "Oink."

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What's the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color.

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Q) What's worse than getting a parking ticket? A) The Black Death

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A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" asks the bartender. "I'm a horse, it's genetic." replied the horse, confused at the bartender's infantile understanding of evolution and other species.

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Why Jimmy doesn't listen to his mother? Because he's deaf

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82

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Yo Mama is so dumb, that she scored significantly below average on the SAT's.

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How did the blind dyslexic boy find his way out of the cornfield? -He drew backwords numbers and letters in the dirt

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A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is quite strange, but then realizes he is dreaming. He awakes and tells his wife about it. His wife tells him to go to sleep. The bartender is now sad because he realizes his marriage is in shambles

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wanna hear a dirty joke? ...trashcan

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i know you talk the talk but can you talk the talk

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Guy- Wanna hear a joke about my dick? Nah, it's too long. Girl- Wanna hear a joke about my vagina? Nah, you'll never get it.

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What is a vampire's favorite desert? Assuming they are real I dont think they would enjoy it in the daylight, so really there's no point.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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