Why did the postal worker go to work? Because he has to support his family so they do not starve like his dog.

What did the man say to the other man? You smell nice today.

you know what they say... hydrate or die

What's worse than finding ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees

A man walks into a bar. He buys a beer, drinks it and walks out.

How do you get a lawyer out of a tree? Lean a ladder against the tree and reassure them if they are apprehensive.

What's worst than getting glass stuck in your foot? Rubbing lotion on a fork.

Mum: Never put off for tomorrow what can be done today. Child: Oh, I was going to play video games tomorrow, so...

Knock Knock Who's there? Can people stop posting grammatically incorrect jokes on here. Half of the sentences do not make sense.

why does crazy george spin a ball on his fingers well? because he has a huge dingo

Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

why do women wear perfume and make-up? 'cause they're ugly and smell bad

A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

Wanna hear a dirty joke? I had gay butt sex.

Person A: Hey! Whats up? Person B: Suicide rates...

whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

Guy 1: "Hey, you have some updawg on your face." Guy 2: "Oh, thanks. Did I get it?" Guy 1: "Yeah, I think so."

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

All I want for Chrismas, the murderer of my parents to be caught.

What's the difference between a gay white man and a gay black man? Nothing because they are both sexually attracted to men.

Take My Wife- Because as it stands, I'm having frequent, toe-curling, unprotected sex with your wife. And that just doesnt seem fair.

What do you get when you cross and elephant and a dog? Nothing, because you cannot breed creatures of different geniuses.

Why were the babies used for target practice? Hitler demanded the Nazis to do so.

Robin, get in the Batmobile.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...