What's the difference between a bird and a horse? - Both can fly, exept the horse.

If at first you don't succeed.... maybe skydiving isn't for you...

Why did the taxi driver kill the blond? He didn't. It's illegal to murder people in most countries.

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

why do women wear perfume and make-up? 'cause they're ugly and smell bad

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

Why can't blondes change a lightbulb? Because they're women

What's 2+2? It's certainly not 1.

Why couldn't the morbidly obese lady order a cheeseburger? A: Because it wasn't on the menu

A man walks into a bar, he is immediately rushed to the emergency room

Guy 1: "Hey, you have some updawg on your face." Guy 2: "Oh, thanks. Did I get it?" Guy 1: "Yeah, I think so."

A man walks into a bar and says "Hi everybody, it's me!" So everybody turns round. But it wasn't him.

What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Punch line.

Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

How did the black guy cross the street? He jumped it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's a chicken and it doesn't know any better. It probably doesn't know where it is much less where it's going.

you know what they say... hydrate or die

What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

elliot forsythe is a paedo

How do you kill a blonde ? Shoot her in the head

what is the difference between a Ferrari and a bucket of dead babies......... I dont have a Ferrari in my garage

When life gives you oranges, make lemonade.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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