Whats green? The color green.

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Do you like apples? Yes

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Q: What do you call an anti-joke? A: An anti-joke

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What do you you call a mexican that jumped the border? successful

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do friends and potatoes have in common? If you eat them, they will die.

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What's funny and looks like a fish? A clown fish

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What did one guy in the bar say to the other? Hi.

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What is red and green and goes round and round? A frog in a blender!

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Whats the difference between males and females? fe

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If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, its probably a turtle.

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Sally." "Go away, Sally. I told you I am not interested." Kevin slammed the door on his colleague, as Sally proceeded to find somebody else and move on with her life. Kevin later in life became a drug addict, and got thrown in jail. Sally got married and had four kids, and while she feels bad for Kevin, she is happy with her life.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs falling skydiving? Jon, because that's his name.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar

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What's black and white and has difficulty turning corners? A nun with a javelin stuck through the neck.

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Yo mama so fat she runs the risk of stroke, heart disease, or diabetes

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Why did the clown fall out of the helicopter?? Gravity

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Yo momma so stupid she scored poorly on her SAT's in high school. She couldn't graduate college and now works a dead end job as a waitress.

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Why Didnt John Return any of his calls he was in a very serious car accident fell into a coma and will probablly will not wake up ever again

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What came first the chicken or the egg? Neither, chickens have been extinct since 1987.

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What does a Somalian want for Christmas? Nothing hes Sunni Muslim and does not celebrate Christmas

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

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Fine, just give me the top comment FOREVER, and I wont LIEK completely copy and assimilate your identity on Horsehead network... Forever... Muahahahahahaha!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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