Roses are red violets are blue make me a sandwhich so i can eat it

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Whats Do You call people, on the top floor of a Double-Decker bus? Passengers

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In mother Russia you don't eat cookie. Dog eat shark. -B.Gill

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What is the difference between 1000 dead babies and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

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why did the little boy start to cry? because his parents didn't love him

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i hate christians and muslims, until drugs are involved. iduno what dat is, i try it.

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6 was afraid of 7 because 7 8 9

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Why was the Irishman ejected from the bar? For breaching client-attorney privilege, and the correct term is disbarred.

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Dora the explorer went on an adventure. sadly, all of the animals in the forest, including boots the monkey and swiper the fox, kill her as a sacrifice to an unknown God

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck, if a wood chuck could chuck oak? Well, If an oatmeal man could oat chuck oat, then a wood oat chucker could chuck oats.

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Want to hear a funny joke Rojo Bunchie

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why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim.

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What do you call a man looking at Anti jokes on this ? you

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Why does girls have two left feet and two left hands? Because girls have no rights.

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My wife is going to the Caribbean Jamaica? No, St Lucia

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why couldn't the man open the window? he had no hands due to his time serving the USA in vietnam

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What's the difference between a person and a cow? 2% of their DNA. The other 98% is virtually identical.

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Whats worst than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red I'm not creative Roses are Blue

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In Soviet Russia, life was very hard due to the failing economy and oppressive government.

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1 black guy jumped off a cliff at the same time as a white guy, who fell first? The one who weighed the most.

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Why are all blondes dumb? They are not all dumb but constant bullying just saying blondes are just pretty gives them that illogical stereo type

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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