An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Q: What did the monkey say to the parrot? A: I like trains so feed me bananas!

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What is the difference between a duck? one of its legs is both the same.

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What does a dinosaur and TImmy's mom have in common? They're both dead

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Knock Knock? Whos there? The police, please open the door.

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What do you get when you cross batman and superman? One egotesticul idiot SOB aka mofo ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

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Thank you for helping to save the animals. You may send your donation as a check to "Anti-Joke" at 555 Main Street, Anytown, CA.

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How do you fit 10,000,000 jews inside a car? It's not physically possible as no car can carry that many people.

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Bob: "Knock knock." Gerald: "who's there?" Bob: "your worst nightmare." Gerald: "your worst nightmare who?" Bob kicks open the door, kills Gerald, ties up his wife, sells his kids to slavery, and burns his house down.

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Four blondes are driving to Disneyland, as they finally got to Florida, they read a sign that said "Disneyland: left" so they turned around and headed home.

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Zafarfanugen the third: Why did the chicken cross the road? Bob: Who cares about some dumb chicken crossing the road! I am more interested in why three generations of your family would continually use such a ridiculous name!

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Oh no! I forgot the milk!

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? You rub your bloody penis on her teddy bear.

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what did the tree say to the other tree? Don't leaf me!

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mark lawson likes boys

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Little Jimmy's mommy loved to see the smile on her only son's face as he ate her homemade cookies. Due to lack of medical knowledge at the time, Little Jimmy contracted diabetes and died before he turned 30. Unmarried and childless, he was diligently working on his doctorate thesis on Astrophysics. His death marked the end of his family line.

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Jesse gets so many ladies

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I EAT YOUR SOUL. NOM NOM.

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Shit, I can't think of anything to write. That does not mean I'm black

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Q: What did the architect say after he tripped? A: My mother died of cancer when I was 6.

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A man walks into a bar. It was a salad bar, so he left.

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Q: What do you call a dog with metal balls and two-inch legs? A: Animatronic

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What did little Mindy Granger find on her paper route? Human teeth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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