I was reading a book about antigravity, but I put it down because it was boring.

Why did little Jimmy go crying to his mummy? Because she was shot.

A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

Roses are red, Violets at blue. My mind is twisted, Bend over bitch your about to get fisted.

Beware of orange frogs with black stripes! They are dangerous! On the other hand, if you see a black frog with orange stripes, you're in no danger.

21

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

Knock Knock. Who's there? Me. You who? Me.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin inside a blender.

What did the dog say to the house? Roof

Q: What did bulbasoar say to charmander? A: Bet ya thought I was gunna say Bulbasoar!!

Why does the Gay guy have a bell on his bike? Because its the only way his blind dog can follow him.

Potato!

a group of teenagers are laughing at a boy around their age when on says "youre stupid" the boy then replies "i prefer the term Autistic"

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman

There was a black and a mexican man in a car. Who was driving? None of them; it was the police driving.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, but it was delicious.

Two babies wonder off from their home. They die of starvation because there parents could not find them in time.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had celebral palsy.

When the loaf of bread crashed the car the wife was mad. What do you think she did? She put Nutella on him toasted him and then ate him

You've been in robotics too long if you start talking to your tools. You've been in there way too long if they start talking back!

What stops a train? A missile

what is worse then finding a worm in your apple find a worm in your ass

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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