A monkey enters a bar and climbs up on a stool. The bartender asks, "What'll ya have, pal?" The monkey, who can niether speak nor understand English, appears slightly perplexed.

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I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

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Q:I finished my Homework A:thats what she said

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how did the bloop cross the road? to get to the other side

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

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A sheep goes up to to a horse and asks "Does you speak sheep?".The horse replies ''Neigh''.

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg is the same.

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How did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room.

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i said wut wut in the butt!

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A sphere rolls around the corner and falls over.

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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Why did the dog cross the road? He was on a walk with his owner so they used a crosswalk to safely get back home.

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roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

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Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravitational force acted upon the monkey who was not holding on to any branch.

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Why did lil yazzy watch The Hills at 12:40 in the morning? Because she was casually surfing netflix and clicked on it.

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YO MOMMA SO FAT... that it is really beginning to be an issue.

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Why are you asleep? Because I'm tired.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? What? No? I'm here to inform you that your child won't be coming out of that coma, I'm sorry.

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go stand in a mirror look at your face that is the joke. 8- now go tell someone you will tell them a joke and do that to them this will be a fast spreading joke. jkjk this joke is so bad everybody give this alot of bad thums. ha ha i do not care

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Two blondes are sitting in a car. They took a drive and later enjoyed turkey sandwiches at the local eatery.

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why did aodhan not play BO2? Aodhan has Cerebral palsy.

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A horse walks into a bar. The owner immediately seeks out the owner of the misplaced obstruction and asks them to remove it promptly less his animal suffers any more untoward damage

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What do you call a horse with no eyes? A horse with no eyes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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