how long does it take for a black woman to shit? a couple of minutes.

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What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

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What is the difference between peanut butter andd jam! Jam is made from crushed fruit and gelatine while peanut butter is made from finely ground peanuts and is often sweetened with sugar.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

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What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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An Irishman walked into a pub and ordered a pint. He had planned to just have one but ended up having two since he'd had a rough day at work. His wife was slightly annoyed that he came home smelling of beer.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a door? Various answers are acceptable. The door has hinges, a black guy has legs, etc.

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Why did the U.S.A. vote in a black president? Because racial prejudice is a thing of the past and the U.S.A. is a liberal and progressive nation.

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How do you make a black man cry? A: Kill his whole family.

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Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

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Knock, Knock Who is there? Yo Yo who? *the man ran away and was never seen again, because he had nowhere to stay*

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Why did the beach ball pop? Because it stepped on a sharp chocolate chip cookie!

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Why did the girls head explode while eating supper? There was a grenade in her food.

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How many polish people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -One

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All I want for Chrismas, the murderer of my parents to be caught.

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Hey man how was your trip? great!!! It blew my mind

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Person 1: What's 2+2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: Oh, you already heard that one.

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What makes women so mystifying and beautiful? Tits.

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What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your doorbell is broken.

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Why couldn't the old man play the piano? His arthritis caused him great pain.

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how many blondes does it take to fix a lightbulb? 764,983,792,545,653,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops