All I want for Chrismas, the murderer of my parents to be caught.

If you lose your left arm, your right one will be left.

A horse walks into a bar. The owner immediately seeks out the owner of the misplaced obstruction and asks them to remove it promptly less his animal suffers any more untoward damage

What did the man say to the other man? You smell nice today.

Why did Windows crash ? F*ck Windows, that's why.

What's 8 inches long and makes my girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth? Her miscarriage

Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

What did the guy who had cancer get for Christmas? Death.

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravitational force acted upon the monkey who was not holding on to any branch.

Whut r bacer dew? Eh muphin

How did the soccer team win? They scored the most goals.

Roses are red violets are blue poems don't have to rhyme..... Refrigerator

Two monkeys are having sex. They both realize they're boys.

Why did the girl fall off the couch? She had a seizure.

How do you put on a condom Very Carefully

Two muffins were sitting in an oven. The first muffin did not look over to the other one and did not talk to it because muffins are objects and do not have the ability to communicate.

A horse walks into a bar.. Several people get up and leave as they see the potential danger in the situation..

What's worse than Hell? The Holocaust.

What did Little Timmy say when his house fell down? I'm not sure but that sounds like a very sad event that I hope to never encounter in my personal experiences.

A monkey enters a bar and climbs up on a stool. The bartender asks, "What'll ya have, pal?" The monkey, who can niether speak nor understand English, appears slightly perplexed.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

Why did the old lady start crying? Because her daughter was raped and killed.

a Jew had a small nose

Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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