Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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Who told the gorilla he couldn't go to the ballet? The people who were in charge of making that decision.

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i keep getting thumbs down...

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What did the blind man say to the fish store owner? I would, 1 fish please.

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What's black and white and red all over? A nun that was stabbed to death.

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeleine mecanne.

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Knock Knock! FUUCKKKK OFFFFFFFF

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How do you distinguish between an unlabeled carton of milk and an unlabeled carton of cream without breaking the seals? You label them.

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What's green, three feet tall, and can live forever? Definitely not Julie Andrews.

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Why was the black man in Jail? He works there as a correctional officer.

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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why did the car crash? Because the driver was just a box of raisen Brand

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Why did the black man run when he heard police sirens? Because he was parked in a handicap spot

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What's funny about a man walking into a bar? He was a clown.

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This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky, It hit one of the random green pipes.

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What did Charlie do when he lost his golden ticket? He killed his grandpa to get it back.

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why was the kid crying? because he had to go to school GDS*

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Why is a four year olds bedroom the hottest place in Texas? Its on fire, like the rest of the state because of a tragic wildfire thats ruining the lives of many people.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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