what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

Roses are red, Violets are violet.

Why was the kid mad? Because he died.

Q: Why was the black guy afraid of the chainsaw A: It was cutting his arm off

How much is that doggy in the window? It's not for sale....it's waiting to be euthanized.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I lost The Game, You just did too.

What made Qtip's so dangerous? Q-tip's music

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger Stand a little taller Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone What doesn't kill you is a bad attempt on your life.

Yo mama's so fat she needed a toilet that had a bigger seat (just like me)

A duck walks into a restraunt and sit's down at it's table. The waiter asks what the duck would like to eat. The duck says "I'd like a tasty, healthy meal that will help me lose weight." The waiter says "How about the rocket salad?" So, the duck orders a rocket salad, eat's it, pays his bill, and leaves.

I was so fat I went on a diet

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are rather unintelligent animals which clearly underestimate the dangers of crossing a busy road.

A man walks into a bar, I forget the rest of this joke and your mother's a whore.

Why did the Asian woman get into a car accident? She didn't pay attention in driver school and sped through a red light and hit a bus that killed 14 children.

A duck walks into a bar "Can I have some brandy, please" says the duck The bartender then proceeds to make millions because he was the first to discover a talking duck

A man walks into a bar and wakes up in the hospital with a mild concussion.

Why did the Smartie get fired from the M&M factory? For throwing out all the W&Ws

Why did the boy run down the road? Because he was being chased by a tsunami

Half koala, half walrus, behold...the Koalrus!

The U.S. economy is in poor condition and it's downfall would have repercussions throughout the entire world.

Why did the boy fall asleep in class? He was tired.

A gorilla walks into a bar and order a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

How do you save a black person from drowning? Take your foot off his head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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