An owl and a squirrel watch a farmer walk by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing because owls are not capable of human speech. The owl then eats the squirrel because the owl is a bird of prey.

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Q: What is your favorite color? M: Blue

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Two guys jump off a cliff... the third guy calls an ambulance.

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why did the koala fall out of the tree? it was shot. why'd the second koala fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first one. why'd the third koala fall out of the tree? it thought they were playing a game. why'd the refrigerator fall out of the tree? it thought it was a koala. why'd the man fall of his bike? it was hit by 3 koala's and a refrigerator.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

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A gay Asian guy walks into a gay bar where he found a fruity looking black man... The Asian went up to the black man and said, " how'r they hanging?" shocked with anger, the black man hits him in the face, knocks him to the ground and said, " YOU DO NOT TALK TO MY FAMILY THAT WAY. BOTH MY GRANPARENTS WERE LYNCHED!!!" the Asian stands up and brushes himself off... He turns to the black guy and says " I meant the balance scale at the table you were were sitting at" the black fellow turns to the table with the notebook and the balance scale with rocks on both sides that he was sitting at... He turns back to the Asian man and apologizes for his rude behavior and buys him a drink... (2 hours later) they have sex

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What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for her birthday? A S.T.D

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So there's this moose right? And he walks into the store and asks where the potatoes are. And the cashier lady says aisle 5. So the moose walks to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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My did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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How many dead hookers can you fit in a trunk? Five

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why did michael jackson write black or white he didnt want black people to copy him

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the holocaust

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Person 1: Ask me if i'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

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When was George Washington born? Who the hell knows. He's older than dirt.

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was a cold day

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When is a clown happy? At a child's birthday party.

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Q:Whats the difference between Jews and Pizza? A: Jewish people are humans, and pizza is a food

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot

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You spent your time reading this and realized there was no joke.

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lewis ya baggy fuck

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What's the difference between gun and penis? A child doesn't start to cry when gun shoots in its mouth.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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knock knock?? whos there?? Not yo cheese because i already ate it

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Why was was a black guy carrying a tv out of someone else's house. He was helping them move.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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