What is green, dangorous, slow, defencive, and scared? A turtle with a uzi.

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Wanna hear another joke? Wes Trillows penis!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I was hoping you could tell me–why else would I ask you a question?

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How do you make a momma bird not fly back to its nest? Burn it down!!

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What did little Sally say to the clown after the party? 'For someone who specializes in entertaining children of a young age, I am slightly underwhelmed at the degree of humor my friends and I have derived from your jokes today.'

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Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim on land... it's called having a swimming pool

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I HATE G-SPOT AND BTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Knock knock... Whose there? Patrick Oh hey, come in...

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what did the elephant step on when he was running through the jungle? .... a coke machine.

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How do you get a nun pregnant? You practice unprotected sex with her.

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What do you call a black guy in a Walmart? A customer. You prejudice dullard!

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what do you have to do to confuse a blond? Nothing

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Where can you find a good lawyer? At a reputable law firm.

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Why did the frog commute suicide ? Because His mother was a type writer

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What's white, warm, and dangerous? Cum.

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why do jews have such big noses? A: it has been inherited through many generations

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Yo momma is so ugly, that your father can no longer stand her. They are getting divorced.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

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Why cant jonny walk? He has no legs.

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What do you call 10 Asians playing basketball? A group of friends hanging out and having a good time.

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How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None, it would be ridiculous to even try to fit one in an ashtray.

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A dyslexic atheist stays up at night wondering if there is a Dog

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Why should you never trust anglers? Because they're always into fishy business... Why should you never trust hunters? Because they carry loaded guns...

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how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops