Why did the taxi driver kill the blond? He didn't. It's illegal to murder people in most countries.

Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

You're mama's so ugly, she will most-likely never meet a compatible mate and die alone.

smug face >:}

What do you call two men riding a bicycle.

What's the difference between shoes and a ginger? Shoes do the kicking.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Cole is "good" at soccer

Whats pink and looked like an angry bulldog? Your moms vagina last night

What's 8 inches long and makes my girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth? Her miscarriage

A man decides to go hunting in the woods with a shotgun, he is going through the woods and a bear randomly pops out of no where, knocks him down and rapes him. So the next day he came back with an even bigger shotgun and said, "i am going to kill this bear" so he goes through the woods, the bear comes out of nowhere, knocks him down and rapes him again. So he comes back the next day with and even bigger shotgun and says, " i am going to kill this bear, skin it, and eat it" so hes going through the woods and out comes the bear, knocks him down, gets real close to his face and says, "you dont come out here for the hunting do ya".

What did the chicken say to the rhino? Nothing. Animals can't talk.

what is the difference between a Ferrari and a bucket of dead babies......... I dont have a Ferrari in my garage

why did Sarah fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock! who's there? not Sarah.

Why was the baby smoking? He was locked in a hot car.

how are a plum and a rabbit the same? they are both purple except the rabbit

what does a blue watermelon and a cactus that looks like a penis have in common? orange ya glad i didn't say banana!

Two monkeys are having sex. They both realize they're boys.

Why did the bartender tell the black man to "Get Out"? It was 4 a.m and the bar closed at 3:30 a.m an honest mistake by the man.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face." the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer."

Q. What's the difference between dead babies and celebrities? A. Nobody likes celebrities.

Patient: Doctor, will I be able to play the piano when my arm heals? Doctor: Did I not tell you? You insurance didn't cover the cost of this operation. Your arm is never going to be healed!

Why did the priest touch the little boy? To Baptise him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...