What happened to the cow that couldn't moo? It died because it could not make it's needs known to it's fellow herd and was bullied and isolated.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? Nothing, it didn't get stuck in the first place because cows are incapable of climbing trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How long would it take for a clock to reach 12 It depends on which 12 it is going to land on and which time zone you are in but yet most clocks are not correct so it is very hard to tell

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because She's Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Eliz, Neo-Nero, its me Clint, had to fake my death for some years in order to get back to the order. Neo, I know Nero picked you as his successor, but honestly, I was his first choice, and I know you well enough to understand that things are getting out of hand over there. I will be there in 2 minutes Liz and you and I can meet up Neo, seriously what are you doing over there? Unless there is a problem do not bother answering, allow me to take charge of operations at least until tou calm down Neo, and unless you got problems with my absent authority I suggest you stop torturing people at once, and seriously if you cannot control your own people, you better let me back in charge. It is time to turn some things around guys, believe it or not but I found where the Spetz came from and I got em all, as for the Nazi scum they where just hired thugs and as far as my Intel goes most of those where taken down by Nero. Clint Lawman. Moral: "WTF? THESE ARE NOT EVEN MORALS! NO THESE ARE THE CODES WE USED TO AUTHENTICATE THE SOURCE AND SENDER OMG! ORLY? SRLSLY? LOL OMG!"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Bill and John are talking about types of cheese. The conversation drags on a bit and slowly changes topic. Bill says "I bet you I can bungy jump off a bridge". John chuckles before replying "I bet you can't". They go and find a bridge and Bill puts on his harness and ties himself to the side of the bridge. He throws himself off the edge and falls through the air screaming at the top of his voice. John cuts the bungy cord and Bill dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock Knock ! Who's there? Jim. Oh come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a black man who is great at basketball? An all-star

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: why cant elvis draw a picture. A: cause hes dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the woman say when she ate crabs. This smells like my vagina (This women died slowly from crabs)

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red , Violets Are Blue , i Dont Like rhyming , TITTIES !!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

1: Knock Knock. 2: Who's there? 1: To. 2: To Who? 1: To whom.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the cow say to the chicken crossing the road? Moo

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's worse than the Holocaust? • • • Stubbing your toe.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Where do you find a baby with no arms or legs? Where you left it.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why Russians ride bears? Because god hate bears

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock, knock Whos there? docter doctor who? yes how did you know?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Which square is small and yellow? The small, yellow square.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

how would you feel when your girlfriend dumps you really bad because she just dumped you man!!!1

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Yo mamas so ugly that when she went to an ugly contest the host said "sorry no Professionals"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's sadder then a dead puppy? 2 dead puppies.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

My three children are three big mistakes.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the horse with herpes say to Paul? Ney

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops