so your in a room with mickey mouse and the lights go off, how did the lights go off mickey mouse turned them off

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This is my first attempt at making an anti-joke: That's was it.

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What do you call a bitchy unreliable friend? You don't call that bitch at all.

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What did the cow say to the farmer? moo

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What's the difference between an apple? An red fox's enzyme defragmenting on tue.

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How do you make a baby stop crying? You throw it out the window.

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Q: Why did the fork cross the balloon? A: Apples

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Why are reading anti-jokes so funny? Im not sure, i just read them and laughter ensues.

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yo mama is so fat she broke a branch off the family tree

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hola said the chinese man

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How do you confuse a blond? Look at her

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A man walks into a bar. The second man sees the first man's mistake and ducks. The third man needs to take no precautions as he is a midget and can simply walk under the bar.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? Whatever you like, it can't hear you.

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Knock Knock! Come in the door is unlocked. I have cookies!

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What are the seven wonders of Kentuky cows,drugs,liquor,moutain due,moster trucks,shot guns and trucks oh and I for got Crackle barrle.

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What's a fun place to visit on the weekend? Uranus.

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There are 2 carrots sitting in a basket. One carrot says to the other; I'm a carrot! The other carrot does not reply, because carrots do not speak. Now consider the possibility, that the first carrot was a talking monkey.

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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I milked the cow, but no gas came out.

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why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

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This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes Good. Enjoy your cold drinks.

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what do get when you throw a penny in between a jew and a mexican? nothing besides one less penny

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A man walks into a bar, he is then escorted to the hospital as a result of brain trauma.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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