Q:Why do black people wear fitted caps? A: So pigeons don't shit on their lips.

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What does Santa and a grape have in common? They're both purple, except Santa.

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what did the blond do when her house was on fire? she called the fire department, because that would be the correct thing to do in such a situation.

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your moms my other ride

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What did the chickens say to the other chicken Go away mother clucker

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Two People runs into a bar. They were thirsty.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers who are you?

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whats worse than 2 people dying? 3 people dying.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I live in Africa Give me water

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? feel the other side of the worm in his mouth

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knock knock no ones home

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NAACP

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How do I want to die? From Chuck Norris killing me, that would be an honor.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Q: How do you fit two beluga whales into a mini van? A: You don't.

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how do you know when you're a man? massive erection.

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What's black and white and red all over? An equality parade with a nearby homicide

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Q. Why did the triceratops die? A. A giant meteor hit him.

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What did the Wind say to the Window? (Insert Racist punchline here)

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how do you make a little girl cry?? Kill her family

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Where did the kittens go on their class filed trip? Nowhere, animals are not permitted to enter a museum unless they are eye seeing dogs helping a person who lacks vision.

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A lumberjack wearing women's underwear under his clothes walks into a bar. Several Canadian Mounties stand up and surround him, compliment him on his cooking and offer to go looking for some wild flowers for his herb collection.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops