pudding

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he's working out.

What do you call a gay scientologist? His first name or last name, depending on how close you 2 are.

What did the man with no teeth say? I need some teeth.

Q:Why do black people wear fitted caps? A: So pigeons don't shit on their lips.

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers who are you?

your moms my other ride

What does Santa and a grape have in common? They're both purple, except Santa.

whats worse than 2 people dying? 3 people dying.

what did the blond do when her house was on fire? she called the fire department, because that would be the correct thing to do in such a situation.

Two People runs into a bar. They were thirsty.

What did the chickens say to the other chicken Go away mother clucker

What's black and white and red all over? An equality parade with a nearby homicide

How do I want to die? From Chuck Norris killing me, that would be an honor.

NAACP

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? feel the other side of the worm in his mouth

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

Q: How do you fit two beluga whales into a mini van? A: You don't.

knock knock no ones home

Q. Why did the triceratops die? A. A giant meteor hit him.

How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I live in Africa Give me water

how do you know when you're a man? massive erection.

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? I can cook a pizza.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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