being drunk in a mall sounds like it would be alot of fun . . . . . . . but that is public intoxication and that is against the law

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was holding hands with the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It saw a banana. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? It slipped. Why did the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? It thought this was all a game. Why did the sixth monkey commit suicide? All his friends were gone.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. The stewardess calls secret service and has the man arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's red and looks like blue paper? Red paper

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Thats a matter of opinion

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Now I have been typing without even thinking about that, and you have been following me.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q:How do you confuse a blonde preschooler? A:Calculus.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

whats a muslims name with a bomb to his chest Whatever his name is HAHAHAHAHAH

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Knock, Knock ...

thumb_up thumb_down -25

yo momma is so stupid, she probably in in the bottom 1% of her age group

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: How do you know your gay? A: When you have unexpected desires for men, which is a sin to a religion, so the choice of being gay is against the bible and you would soon be sent to the pit of fire we call hell.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

FORTY SECONDS!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a Mexican in a kitchen? A chef.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Getting up for a black person on a buss

thumb_up thumb_down -25

whats the difference between G. Bush and a rock? Bush (bull)shits and rock doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why do I write Anit-jokes. Because I'm very bad at delevering good punchlines. They generally fall flat.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did Mel Gibson say to his wife? I apologise for my rude behaviour and intolorable cursing.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? The black man. The mexican got his arms shot off in the war and is severely paralyzed. God Bless our troops. Thank you for serving us.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

You know what's funny about AIDS? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Nope.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

The last time I heard that joke, I fell off my pet single celled bacteria.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what did the surfer do on his computer? browse the internet

thumb_up thumb_down -25

I went up to my friend and she said to me, "Foop." I calmly went to the nearest teacher and told her that Susie is having a mental breakdown again

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops