A dyslexic man walks into a bra. His face bumped into something that was soft, squishy, smooth, and round... It was a balloon. Someone was having a birthday party.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

This is a haiku I said this is a haiku You read a haiku

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what type of cat has green feathers? a green-feathered cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A black man walks into a... nevermind, this joke is dumb.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

a man walks into a bar and it hurts

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the fish say after he

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is similar to an orange?? A tangerine.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the mexican say to the black guy before he went to work. Hey

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what is yellow with red all over tweety in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Unconventional thinking Something else out of one: So sometimes I feel there is something I want right? But I don't feel like I deserve it yet or i hesitate although I fucking want it So I go home, decide to take my time before I decide to buy it, and sit my ass on a chair covered with spikes until I decide it is time to get it, Moral 1: You want to take the better decision but don't feel time is right? Some spikes up your ass is not only the perfect way to change your mind, but in this case an excellent metaphor to why you want to keep doing whats best for you. Moral best: Think if you could get all that time you spent hesitating back, would that not be awesome? What if you just stop hesitating now? Would that not be aweso... Go fuckyourself... Nerometal Fuck Neronism... Cool name though

thumb_up thumb_down -6

An elderly man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey Dad!" The old man replies, "Hi son. I'll have a Bud Light." The bartender serves his dad a Bud Light and says, "I'm thinking about going back to school to become a doctor." The old man says, "I'm an alcoholic." The bartender replies, "Great, another Bud Light coming up!"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

-Knock knock. ~Use the doorbell. -Ding dong. ~The witch is dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

So a blonde, brunete, and red head are all on the side of the road for prostitution. so a man walks up to the red head with money. she takes it and runs off. a man goes up to the bruenete and hands her money, but she also takes it and runs. so a man walks up to the blond with money and she says "wait...we get paid to do this?"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the man's ex-wife told him after their divorce? "Build a bridge and get over did" And so he did because hes a contractor that specialized in structures spanning and providing passage over a gap or barrier, such as a river or roadway

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Doctor! Doctor! There is a fly in my soup! Moral: Huh?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the little girl stop licking her Popsicle? A psychopath cut off her tongue.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Statistics show That people with the most birthdays Live the longest

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why cant women drive? Actually, they can

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock Knock! Who's there? I don't remember the rest of the joke but your mom's a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A sloth walked into the dentists he was confused

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q:Whats a similarity between your mom and your dad? A:They both hate you -Ryan V

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the dog lick his balls? Because he can.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

If you are riding uphill in a canoe and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to fit in the dog house? None. Ice cream has no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops