What do you call a horse standing alone in an empty field? Tesco's own Beef Lasagne.

Who has a big nose? YOU!!!

Why did the boy Drop his Ice Cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

What did one cat say to another? Cats cant talk

Q. What's the definition of mixed emotions? A. Watching your attorney drive off a cliff in your new car.

How did the blonde girl fall down? She didnt see where she was goin

What do you call a black man? A person

How many jews can you fit into an ash-tray? none because the volume of a human is much greater than an any ash-tray

what do you call a Palestinian with a large blade at the throat of an Israeli? a barber

wounds are red bruises are blue I've got five fingers the middle ones for you

What did the wife say to the husband? I'm a man.

What do you think would happen if there was a zombie apocalypse? You would just die.

A: Knock, knock. B: Who's there? The writer of this joke had no idea how to end this.

What do you call a man that eats a sandwich? Hungry.

What's flaming and has wheels? A firepit. I lied about the wheels.

Well, I guess it's back to the drawing board.

Knock knock who's there? Boo. Boo who? Uh, Boo Johnson, your next door neighbor. Forget it I'll come another day.

What Makes Me Smile? Face Muscles.

What is the definition of “making love”? Something a woman does while a guy is f-ing her.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being taken to the slaughter house

What does a ghost get when he watches porn? A boner

What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff. What's green and fluffy? Green fluff. What's red and fluffy? A kitten that got hit by a truck.

What's 6 + 9? 15.

Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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