Why did the chicken cross the road? The pen was left open, and it felt slightly curious.

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what did the teacher say to the kid? you failed the kid cried.

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A horse walks into a bar. The owner immediately seeks out the owner of the misplaced obstruction and asks them to remove it promptly less his animal suffers any more untoward damage

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when riding on a roller coaster.

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How did the black guy cross the street? He jumped it.

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how do you kill a bear. -you shoot it.

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Every 20 seconds, a child in africa starves to death... Every 30 seconds, an obese american teen stuffs their face with McDonalds

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He is destroying his family.

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A seal walks into a club...

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Knock Knock. "Who's there?" The cops.

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Whats plastic and phonie a phone

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Why did the taxi driver kill the blond? He didn't. It's illegal to murder people in most countries.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Lame Anti Jokes.

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An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They enjoy a few quiet drinks while watching a rugby match between Italy and France on the big screen, which is why they came into this particular bar. The Englishman hopes Italy will win, the Irishman is also supporting Italy while the Scotsman is up for France. France wins the match and the Scotsman says "Good game lads eh?" The others agree.

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What did the japonese man say? Nothing that we can understand.

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Why did the bartender tell the black man to "Get Out"? It was 4 a.m and the bar closed at 3:30 a.m an honest mistake by the man.

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The sun was burning as the Elephant offered the mouse to walk between the sun and the mouse so the mouse could get some shade. Mouse: Lets switch places so you can have some shade too! Elephant: Good idea! Just then unexpectedly the elephant slipped on a banana peel and tilted towards the mouse. Squish. Moral: The reason they never tell kids the full story... for real.. honest...

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Q: What's green has four legs and would kill you if it fell off a roof and hit you? A: A pool table.

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What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

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How do you kill a blonde woman? Stab her in the stomach so all the acidic contents of her stomach slowly burn her flesh.

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Knock Know Who's there Interrupting ghost Interu--BOO!!! Ha HA!

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Why is Jem no longer a cartoon? Because they all died from toxic hairspray.

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How many dead children can you fit in a garbage can? Give me a knife and i will find out

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, Others don't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops