A man walks in to a bar, wakes up the next morning with the news that they have found a cancerous tumor in his neck.

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How do all Asians look? With their eyes.

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Santa Clause, a smart blonde, and the Queen of England all jump out of a plane, which hits the ground first? Galileo's theory tells us that all objects fall at the same speed regardless of weight, so they all hit simultaneously.

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Wha did the fireman say when he burnt his finger? Shit.

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One game a Packers Player scored a touchdown and jumped into the stands. When everybody was touching him one girl put her hand on the inside of his thigh. He told the girl " If your hand goes a little higher you'll feel my touchdown spike."

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How are jello and frankenstein alike? Both green, both alive, and bill cosby didn't make me want either.

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How many black people can you fit into a cardboard box? Depends on how big the box is.

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Why couldnt the dog bark? The dog didnt exist.

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what's the difference between 7 and 2? 5

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Yo momma so fat she when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

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I had a really funny joke about a dead baby...but I threw it out

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Why is a building called a building when it's already been built? My pinky is pink and my liver helps me live.

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What's worse than someone posting a number on antijoke ? Someone posting about what's worse than the holocaust

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? a fridge was thrown at her

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is concerned about his fitness and decided to walk to work instead of drive.

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Q: What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: One is a person, one is a food.

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Ill never forget the last phone conversation i had with my Jewish friend before he died due to the 9/11 incident. Friend:owejpq3jhp3qjopiqwejhriopjhaiophfioashiohwih13ioh3f2893hoiqehefioahfioahisdpahdfajdfopasjiopdfajdfopsajradalkdjakldja;hdfkl;adhlpa;dhfakl;dhkladhkadhlkhdjklahdjkgsdjkgbdqwgy3bi3grqbhgjkasjkdkasjdgjkadgskajgdkajdsgjkasgdad

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A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

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Why did Jimmy miss a question on his test? He put D

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How do you stop a bus? Press the brakes

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Whats 2+1? 2.

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What do chinese people eat? Chinese food.

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What do you call an iphone in a puddle? Broken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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